Twilight

Twilight, the first in a four-book series by Stephanie Meyer, is the Romeo and Juliet for the tween generation.

Except, Romeo hates sunlight and must tame his desire to suck the blood of his Juliet. Talk about a compelling reason to stay abstinent.

On the movie screen, the love affair of Bella and Edward plays out, much like it did in the book. But those who aren't fans of the series won't become fans because of this movie.

The film, as directed by Catherine Hardwicke, gets the angst of teenage life, especially in Bella (played brilliantly by Kristen Stewart). As the movie begins, Bella moves from Arizona to a small town called Forks to be with her father, who also happens to be the sheriff.

She has no friends, she is awkward and given to fits of clumsiness. And worst of all, she gets a beat-up red pick-up truck to ride around in.

On her first day of class, she meets Edward Cullen, a pale-faced heartthrob who almost becomes sick at the sight of her. Not a good impression, but Bella finds herself both disgusted and drawn to the mystery man.

It certainly doesn't hurt that Edward saves her life in a way that physics just can't explain. By the time she discovers Edward's secret -- he's a vampire who prefers animal blood -- she is "unconditionally and irrevocably" in love with him.

This is where things get tricky. Maybe in the 600-plus page book the movie is based on, we can believe that real love exists between Edward and Bella. But not in a two hour movie do you fully believe it.

The tension comes in the desires of both being unfulfilled because Edward cannot risk hurting his love by loving her. He cannot lose control even though every bit of his body wants to. Their love is unrequited.

But the "bite me so I can be with you forever" is a bit much to take, and guys dragged to this movie by their girlfriends will have to sit through an hour and a half of this overwrought dialogue to get to any action. And unfortunately, the action sucks. The special effects are awful and cheesy beyond belief. No teeth are bared, and all we get is a bunch of flying vampires. What is this? Super Vampire.

Nothing in this movie made me curious about the books or made me interested in seeing the

sequel. Maybe this is because I am not a teenage girl all in love with the whole idea of Edward Cullen. Oh well. Forgive me.

But I like vampire movies, and this wasn't one of the best. Sorry. I need something to sink my teeth in.